Rambo's Rampages...

 More like bowl.  A nice bowl, of course. A vintage white enamel one, specifically. They are my preferred style of kitchen ware. Light, tinsley, and most importantly they harken back to a different time where we cooked our meals over  fireplaces (inside or out) and lit our homes with candles and lanterns.  So it only made sense to use one for his bones.  He wasn't my favorite when he died, and this wasn't even my plan initially- to keep his bones- but when the time came it all just seemed to make sense. It still makes sense. I think of him and think, "Yeah, it's appropriate that your skull is on the kitchen sill behind my sink." It's our cat. ONE of our cats I should say. I clarify this only to show that he wasn't our one and only cat and I've already stated that he wasn't my favorite. But he was the one that both my husband and I came to an understanding with.  The understanding with my husband was: You are cat; you give me what I want and I will ...

 A couple of years ago my husband had this grand dream of getting an aquarium. Long story short, we got an aquarium. It was WAY harder to get started than we could have imagined and more than a few fish sacrificed their lives in our learning adventure. BUT after hundreds of water testing strips and filters and plants we finally struck a happy balance of fish and PH and got it chemically correct and grammatically correct and had a healthy tank.    So imagine for me, if you will, the constant pleasing, almost unnoticeable sound of the water running, the nice hue of light emanating from the tank, and the subtle movement of life continuously playing in the backgorund. Imagine your fish steadily growing- larger than you would have thought and the surprising fact that you really enjoy watching them.  On nights that Theodore's nurse isn't here and we find ourselves sleeping downstairs to accommodate him it's like a pleasant white noise as you sleep. The couch lies perpendic...

I'll admit it, I'm not a spring chicken anymore. Somewhere after I turned 30 my body and mind (mostly mind) decided they were going to knot themselves, or loose themselves. I'm not sure which. But whatever happened left me like "Well, this is it. I guess just death is left."  So anyway... I think I found my spirit animal.   Yes, kid, yes. I do. I don't even actually know what you said, but I feel you in the depths of my soul.   I relate to the rapid searching of your mind for the right word that has miraculously disappeared from your vocabulary. I relate to your utter unashamed determination to NEVER QUIT until you say exactly what you wanted to say. And mostly, I relate to you doing this all out loud. If I'm suffering you're all suffering.  Dear kid that I don't know, back when this video came out I could not relate. I didn't fully appreciate you. But now. Oh now, I really do. Unfortunately for me, trying to order a breakfast sandwich at the...

Handheld Vacuum  Sealer. Have you guys heard of these things? These crazy, beautiful creations? You probably have. It took me about 2 years to get on the meme train, I still don't have an Instapot, and "cold busted" is still in my repertoire. (But come on, you know there's no better word for those stinging digs.) Nevertheless, I have just discovered this novelty, thanks to my mother in law (who, yes, is FAR more current than I).  Um... these things are amazing.   LOOK AT MY CHOCOLATE CHIPS. JUST LOOK AT THEM. Also, look at my counter tops. That was totally intentional.    I have avoided the whole vacuum sealer thing because.... I just didn't want to do it *whiny voice*. Having to pull out another machine, setting it up, finding a place to store it... Okay, that might not seem bad, but it is. It always felt like such a chore. And when you already have to vacuum your house twice a day because you have two German Shepherds - you read that right. Twice. A. Day...

I attended a funeral today. A father to one of my best friends. It's true that I didn't know the man well. Listening to his children speak today, however, made one thing clear: we all have scars. And that somehow binds us all. I've had my fair share of pain. The brokenness of this world has broken me. And I could list a thousand reasons why I'm not thankful for that; why it makes me angry or sad or hurt... still. I could easily recall how lost and empty I felt. I could still cry. But... I can list one and ONLY one why I am thankful for the scars: because without them I wouldn't know who Jesus is. Who He REALLY is. This doesn't dull the pain. And it doesn't nullify it, either. But it has somehow, finally, made it okay. I know, without a doubt, that I have known Jesus in His suffering... in my suffering. And He was there. We were bound before by His infinite mercy and sacrifice, but we are now doubly bound by His compassion and care over me. My friend...

Some days I wonder how much I really love my children. And then there are days I spend literal HOURS working on 16 feet of tangled and knotted room decor: And I realize that I love them, like, so much.  So, yeah, I've pretty much got this parenting thing down.  

Do you ever look at your life and think, "Man, I have got it made. Life's not perfect, but I'm enjoying this ride"? Please tell me what that's like.